Surrender

Dictionary.com defines "surrender" as:  to give oneself up, as into the power of another; submit or yield.


If you've ever been involved in any sort of 12 step group, you'll find that step 3 states:  "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over the the care of God as we understood Him."  If, like me, you prefer to feel in control of your own life, you probably find the concept of surrendering rather distasteful.  The very word "surrender" tends to conjure images of soldiers on a battle field, lifting a white flag, handing over their freedom and lives to an enemy.  Or perhaps you envision the giving away of your own freedom when you consider surrendering to anyone.  


James 3:17 says:  But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. 


Perhaps the lesson in the scripture is that the surrendering of our will to God isn't at all distasteful.  Perhaps in that act of obedience we can finally realize that if God is in control we don't have to be.  Perhaps not having to be in control of all things at all times, could lift an anvil sized weight off of our collectively hunched shoulders.


Sort of like the 5 levels of grief, I've come up with the 8 levels of surrendering "it" to God:


1.  YOU can have it!  (said through clenched teeth, knowing full well that we'll take back whatever "it" is the moment it rears it's ugly head)


2.  You can have it... (said shyly, after realizing that we've taken "it" back, yet again)


3.  You CAN have it!  (said with enthusiasm, once we've decided that we in fact, DON'T want "it" back)


4.  YOU TAKE IT!  (said with tears of frustration when we've realized we've inadvertently allowed "it" to be in control yet again)


5.  You still have it, right?  (said when doubt rises up in the pits of our stomachs)


6.  You DO still have it!  (said with a smile, when something or someone reminds us that we don't have to be in charge)


7.  Ummm, God?  I think I took it back again.  (said a bit sheepishly when our controlling selves stepped in again)


8.  Whew!  I'm sure glad I don't have it anymore.  (said with a smile while sharing your story with another)


Not my usual light-hearted, find the humor in life, fare, but perhaps a bit of self actualization.  Hope ya'll don't mind too much :).


Witty quip of the day:  I give, I yield, I surrender, I submit... Uncle!!!  Try it.  It's actually quite freeing.

Pink Frosting

I have a problem.  Whew!  I admitted it!  That's step one right?  No, it's not what you're thinking.  I don't drink, I don't do drugs, I'm not a closet gambler or even a hoarder.  Admittedly, I have a tiny OCD-ish tendency with regards to my pantry and towels hanging evenly, but really it's not a problem (just ask my hubby and kids).  No, the problem that I've recently had to admit to is pink frosting.  I can't do it.  I simply cannot force myself to eat something covered in pink frosting.  It immediately causes the gag reflex to go into overdrive.

A few weeks ago I attended the birthday party of a friend's granddaughter.  My friend's daughter handmade the most adorable little piggy cupcakes much like those in the picture here.  They were so cute and they were handmade, which in my world translates to super yummy!  Except...  Pink frosting.  I kept going back to the tray intending to savor just one of those little confections and then I'd walk away trying not to allow everyone else in attendance watch my personal struggle.  I left that day having to acknowledge that I've got a problem.  With pink frosting.  I'm not kidding.  Do you suppose there's a support group for those with an aversion to unnaturally colored foods?  Did I mention I also struggle with blue M&M's?  Not the yellow, not the green, just the blue.

What bizarre food issues do you have?  Can you admit to an issue that no one else within your scope of friends and family suffers from?  Do you gag a little at the thought of something that most people love crossing your very discerning lips?  Let's chat...

PMS and the Holy Spirit?

To an online prayer group I belong to, I wrote the following:  God save me from raging hormones and pompous, arrogant city workers who believe their time is FAR more valuable than that of the assistant (that would be me) to the Executive Director of a 3 building elder care campus.  ARRRRGGGG!!!!  


Okay Holy Spirit, time to do your thing.  Zap me!  Whack me upside the head!  But please, oh please, give me the wherewithal to take a breath before I speak, cuz if I pray for strength, combined with the hormones, I'll likely turn into the Incredible Hulk - and you wouldn't like me when I'm angry.  Well that, and I really don't look great in that particular shade of green.  Just sayin'. 

**meek, small voice: prayers are much appreciated right now, thanks.

PMS.  Pre-menstrual-syndrome.  Every year that passes, it just gets worse and worse.  Every year that passes, I ask the doctor "but WHY can't you just yank it all out?".  With every year that passes, the more certain I become that for 10 days a month I turn into a wholly different, not entirely human, being!  One without compassion, or patience, or control.  One whom, once crossed, instantly sees red and as a result spends an amazing amount of time apologizing to people.  Let me tell you how much THAT is so my FAVORITE thing to do.  *Deep breath*  *Deep breath* *Deep breath*

So this time (I'm a little slow to realize certain things) I had the brilliant idea to ask for prayer from those lovely folks in my prayer group.  Will it help?  Will God actually reach down, touch my head, and say "be thou FREE from PMS for all eternity"?  Who knows, but it sure made me feel better to ask.  Well, that and the iced coffee, and Simple Minds playing on Pandora, and the small salad I found in the fridge. 

Today's witty quip:  Just hand over the chocolate and no one gets hurt! 

Mini Clubs recipe

Just a quick stop in to share this recipe I just found. Holy cats! I LOVE LOVE LOVE me some club sandwiches... although in typical Sophisticated Girl fashion, I'll make it my own.

Try substituting sour dough rolls (cut in half to make them smaller)

Use fresh deli sliced turkey (as opposed to prepackaged)

Try REAL cheese, not that nasty plastic stuff

And Miracle Whip? Really? How about Best Foods!

Let me know what you think!

Happy munching!

Mini Clubs recipe

Mini Clubs

1 tomato, chopped

4 slices OSCAR MAYER Center Cut Bacon, cooked, crumbled

1/4 cup MIRACLE WHIP Dressing

1 pkg. (12 oz.) dinner rolls (12 rolls), split

3 KRAFT Big Slice Sharp Cheddar Cheese Slices, each cut into 4 pieces

1 pkg. (9 oz.) OSCAR MAYER Deli Fresh Shaved Oven Roasted Turkey Breast

6 lettuce leaves, torn in half

make it

COMBINE tomatoes, bacon and dressing.

FILL rolls with cheese, turkey, lettuce and tomato mixture.

Eat, Pray, Blog - I mean Love

I recently watched Eat, Pray, Love. No, I mean I REALLY watched Eat, Pray, Love. In fact, I felt I had to view it a second time immediately after the first.

First I want to say (before the emails come in), no I’m not converting to any sort of Eastern religion, yes I’m still a full-fledged Christian, and no, I’m not running off on a sojourn to countries far, far way. Although, if anyone knows how I can continue to feed my family whilst touring Greece, I’m open to suggestion.

Secondly, I would like to impart the following: If you haven’t watched this movie, do so. Ignore the blatant attempt to convert you to Hindu-type religion. Rather, insert Jesus Christ into the picture. In other words, as Julia Roberts is being taught meditation and prayer, see yourself mediating on Christ instead of on Buddha or a Guru. Meditate on the only One to have died for our salvation. Mediate on God and his unimaginable love for ALL of us. Meditate on the challenges in our lives, and thank God for them. A thought to ponder: if we weren’t exactly where God intended us to be, we likely wouldn’t have the blessings in our lives either.

Here’s what I occurred to me while watching Eat, Pray, Love:

1. Eat. I’ve eaten myself into oblivion. That might be overstating a bit, but most certainly I’ve eaten myself into poor health. I’ve allowed food to be a god of sorts. I’ve begun fasting and praying that the “Eat” portion of my journey has been a prominent item long enough. So for me, “Eat” means whole and healthy as opposed to gluttony and excess.

2. Pray. My prayer life has been sporadic at best. The “Pray” portion of my journey suddenly became a joy I didn't realize existed as I’ve embarked on a mission of fasting and relying on God for my sustenance. I find myself smiling when I pray instead of frowning and trying to find the right words. The words simply flow now from somewhere within.

3. Love. I’ve allowed the challenges in my life to overshadow my joy, and I’d forgotten that “love” is so much more than an emotion. “Love” is a verb. An action word. What that means in my crazy world, is that I need to show my love to my God, my husband, my children, and to myself.

Witty quip of the day: Yes, I’m off of my soapbox. No, I can’t be talked out of my journey. Yes, my love goes out to you all. Cheers!

I'm actually speechless...

Thursday pic-a-pic

Today's witty quip:  Brings new meaning to the term "what-up hooker?!?", doesn't it?

Yaaaawwwn

You may remember my friend "Jane" who manages a low income housing complex and whose tenants keep her on her toes.  Case in point:  the privately paid housekeeper (paid for by the tenant's family) who poked her head into Jane's office the other day to advise that she was on site to clean Mrs. X's apartment and who then announced that she hadn't slept well the night before and would Jane mind if she (the housekeeper) took a "little nap" on the sofa in the reception area.  Jane's response was something along the lines of - awkward pause - "no, you may not sleep in our reception area!" 

People genuinely never cease to shock and amaze me.  I really can't explain why!  I've seen some crazy things in my lifetime, had the distinct "pleasure" of knowing all sorts of people both savory and unsavory, if you will, and yet whenever someone comes onto my radar with what would seem to be a complete lack of couth and social grace, I'm still astonished.  I'm still taken aback.  Clearly I need to lower my expectations of humanity as a whole.  I have this innate belief (which is evidently a tad skewed) that most people are decent, hard working, willing to lend a helping hand, and would never deliberately act in a manner that would be considered by most of society, as inappropriate.  How twisted is MY thinking?

Witty quip of the day:  you know, I think I'm a bit too sleepy to come up with anything witty, so instead I'm heading to Starbucks down the street to ask if I can nap on their sofa.  Sweet dreams!

In other news...

As a new feature, on Wednesdays I'll be posting something interesting from local or national news.  This is absolutely open to comment and I would LOVE to hear your thoughts.

In other news...

According to an article by the Associated Press; in Fort Wayne, Indiana despite the new government building being entitled Citizens Square, it will be fondly referred to by the townsfolk as the Harry Baals Government Center.  Officials, worried that the name would be ridiculed, decided not to name the building after Baals, although city spokesman Frank Suarez indicated that the city mayor simply didn't want to name the building after a person.


Per an online poll of Fort Wayne citizens, first place went to the "Harry Baals Government Center." While their second-place choice was "Thunder Dome."  Not sure which is the lesser of two evils here.

Reportedly, though his descendants pronounce their name "bales" (baylz), the former mayor pronounced his name "balls."  Any why wouldn't he?  The man's in politics and you know what they say, any publicity is good publicity.  And I'm betting that his is a name for which recognition will NEVER be an issue.

Witty quip of the day:  ummmm... it's really sorta hard to top Harry Balls, I mean, Baals.  Thoughts?

Social Networking???

Earlier this evening a girlfriend and I were pondering the do's and don't's, or perhaps the should's and should not's of social networking.  I pose the following questions to you, my faithful readers.  Is there a certain amount of etiquette reasonably expected on sites like Facebook or Twitter?  Should we simply post any thought that scrolls through our minds at any given time of the day or night with no thought whatsoever as to consequence or whether or not anyone cares to read that particular morsel?  Would we be better off considering that perhaps social networking is supposed to be for entertainment value and that our postings of how much we hate our lives and/or situations and/or partners/spouses/lovers/children/dogs/neighbors/or the crazy cat lady might be fodder better suited to an email to oh, say, a sponsor or a suicide hot line?

I realize that in cyberspace we are all allowed to be anything or anyone we choose.  We can vent, brag, conceal, deny, implore, stand on our soapboxes, lurk, swear, stalk, talk smack, speak in other tongues, berate, beg, belittle, befriend, unfriend, and give an hour by hour description of our day to day routines.  We post pictures, spread news, spread gossip, tell jokes, play pranks, say mean and awful things, or say something truly uplifting and hoist our fellow networkers on our collective shoulders and give a mighty HOO-RAH for any accomplishment whether real or imagined.  Who am I to say what's right and what's wrong when it comes to posting our inner most thoughts on the Internet for any and all who care to go looking, to see?

All of the above however; begs the point to be made that anything you post is available for ALL TO SEE.  Prospective employers, credit granters, landlords, school administrators, lawyers, doctors, police, the crazy cat lady.  I think what I'm trying to impart is before we lay ourselves bare, served up on a shiny, binary, silver platter, we might want to ask ourselves this:  would I want my kid/employer/spouse/Higher Power to read what I've written and have it forever enshrined in cyberspace?  I'd also like to pose the question to you good people, does anyone really benefit by posting passive-aggressive comments?  Really?

Witty quip of the day:  By swallowing evil words unsaid, no one has ever harmed his stomach. ~Winston Churchill