Saturday, April 18, 2009

Witty Quips For Everyday Use

As I lounge here sipping my morning coffee and contemplating such important topics as whether or not to treat myself to a pedicure versus tackling the vast mountain of laundry currently calling my name, I find myself wondering whether in fact the laundry literally just SPOKE! I'm going out on a limb here and presuming it didn't. I'm certain however it wasn't the dog or even my conniving cats who managed to pull one over on my daughter and me this morning and got themselves fed not once but twice, and assuming rather that it was my conscience whispering words of disdain designed to instigate the guilt necessary to get me to finish doing the laundry. Oh and my cats? They are the former leaders of the evil cat cult my children were certain lived beneath the deck at our old house. But I digress... Today's "witty quip for everyday use" is: "What now, quippy?!?". For those of you unfamiliar with this catchy phrase I should in all fairness cite my source. The erroneously cancelled TV series, The Gilmore Girls, provided today's witty quip. Setting the scene: Rory Gilmore has just been turned away from taking an important test by arriving late to class due to a deer hitting her Jeep on her way to school. Rory lost her normally well kept cool and launched into a diatribe, directing the final portion of said diatribe to Paris, an extremely narcissistic young woman whose constant verbal haranguing has culminated in Rory leaning down to Paris and shouting, "what now, quippy?". For those of us requiring a definition, allow me to offer an example: when frustrated or perhaps even agitated, instead of shouting "how do you like them apples?!?", one could instead change it up and shout "what now, quippy?!?". Try it out for yourself. Don't worry, I'll wait. (cue the Jeopardy music here) Now, don't you feel better? Wasn't that refreshing? A dear friend and I use this particular quip on a fairly regular basis as we love the confused looks upon the faces of the befuddled souls for whom we've chosen to bestow our newest riposte upon.

I leave you with a recently discovered anonymous quote: "If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague."

Ciao for now!
Apryl :)

5 comments:

nveff said...

Honey, this is wonderful!! You absolutely have missed your calling if you don't keep writing!!
I look forward to following your blog. And in the famous words of a young woman I know and love dearly, what now quippy?
Mom

seminolecollision said...

I never watched the Gilmore Girls but I did buy the 1st season DVD set and so now I have a reason to sit and watch them. You really should be a columnist girl, you are quick and whitty! I enjoyed this one as well.....what now quippy?!?

Apryl Schneider said...

I highly recommend Gilmore Girls! What a fun show to get involved in. We have a weekly "GG" night in which Crystyn, Brianna, Monyka, and I indulge in 2 or 3 episodes replete with laughter, finger food, and fun company. I'm thrilled that you've enjoyed this post! Now say it with me... WHAT NOW QUIPPY?!?

Apryl :)

nveff said...

How amazingly true this is!! However, lest you forget my dear daughter, remember all the cats we owned? And there were only two that I opted for in the beginning...but from Ezzie forward, they were your desires. You remember calling me at work each time with "Oh mom, it came into our yard...can we keep it?" Then there was the "puppy" you found in the dumpster that in my mind's eye was cute and little...and in reality was half a horse for size. So, it isn't just boys and their toys!!!
I love you,
Mom

nveff said...

I do recall the incident with Logan. He was always such a cute little boy. And yes, especially clever. And the new furniture and carpeting was wonderful. I was just thankful the fire did not reach the Christmas tree!!!
And lest we leave out the other two, don't forget the time Ryan cut Monyka's hair while you were in the shower!!!
I love you,
Mom